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  • #79756
    Originally posted by AlabamAlum View Post
    I need a bottle of Malort. It’s proven difficult to source down here.
    You need Malort like you need a bullet in the head.

    Actually while it IS quite bad, it’s not the combination of vomit and baby diapers I was anticipating. More like an extremely bad barleywine.
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    • #79757
      Oh I’ve had it on a trip to Chicago (and an Old Style beer).

      I’m throwing a party for a retiring friend who is from Chicago.
      "The problem with quotes on the Internet is that it is sometimes hard to verify their authenticity." -Abraham Lincoln
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      • #79758
        You're like 10 days too late...I was just there over Memorial Day Weekend. I'm guessing it's tough to ship (maybe illegal?) to Alabama
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        • #79759
          Shop at Binny's and you can get a 24 pack of Old Style for like $12
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          • #79760
            Yeah. Alabama liquor laws make Pennsylvania laws look reasonable.
            "The problem with quotes on the Internet is that it is sometimes hard to verify their authenticity." -Abraham Lincoln
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            • #79761
              Oh fuck Pennsylvania and their liquor laws. Goddamn Oliver Cromwell has apparently been their Governor for the past 300 years.
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              • #79762
                Those poor people are so booze-starved that they even think Iron City is good beer
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                • #79763
                  Less liquor law bs...more of all of youse shutting the fuck up...
                  Shut the fuck up Donny!
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                  • #79764
                    I have been drinking Hamms. Just because I can'r find Old Style....Just saying. Works for me you uppity dick heads.
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                    • #79765
                      I've heard that Hamms can easily be mistaken for Listerine.
                      "in order to lead America you must love America"
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                      • #79766
                        Hamm's is the an acceptable alternative to Old Style. Old Style is trash, but, as noted, it's quintessential Chicago.

                        Malort is somewhere between quintessentially and esoterically Chicago. You can find it there and, of course, pretty much only there. But you have to look. As as I'm concerned, Carl Jeppson, under different circumstances, would have been a war criminal, serial killer or worse. There's no other explanation. And, FTR, calling it a digestif doesn't make it taste better. Overall, it's just a stupid, stupid drink...unlike...

                        ...the fermented holy nectar of firm ripe plums.

                        There's a reason why one elixir reaches no further than several Chicago neighborhoods notorious for buggery, Nicholas Cage idolatry and rife with the pallates of the true masochists, whilst the other embodies an entire noble culture and region of Europe.
                        Last edited by iam416; June 10, 2022, 06:09 AM.
                        Dan Patrick: What was your reaction to [Urban Meyer being hired]?
                        Brady Hoke: You know.....not....good.
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                        • #79767
                          Slivo is the preferred liquer of all Balkan madmen. Pairs well with cyanide I hear

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                          • #79768
                            It's the preferred liquor of all Balkans, including their madmen. It also has the decided advantage of being free of peat.
                            Dan Patrick: What was your reaction to [Urban Meyer being hired]?
                            Brady Hoke: You know.....not....good.
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                            • #79769
                              New that he would go after his own daughter, if only mildly ("She had checked out")

                              Did you enjoy the show, crash?



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                              • #79770
                                Originally posted by iam416 View Post
                                It's the preferred liquor of all Balkans, including their madmen. It also has the decided advantage of being free of peat.
                                Well one civilization looked upwards and gazed upon the supple fruits of the plum tree and elevated their society. The other said "Hey look at this shit I found in the ground. Think we can eat it?"
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