DSL's Movie/TV Reviews and Discussion

[AlabamAlum]

I’ll see MI7. Mindless popcorn action flick. Yes, please. Sure, it’s not “National Treasure” but not every film can aspire to such heights.

[AlabamAlum]

And, to be honest, I’ll never forgive Gibson for starring in “Signs” - the worst and most ridiculous highly-rated movie in history.

[Dr. Strangelove]

Disney's live-action remakes will probably keep going. I mean everyone thought the Little Mermaid looked shitty and reviews were mediocre, but it still made $550M globally. Enough to be 5th best for the year (for now, MI7 will obviously jump it).

[Dr. Strangelove]

And looking at the numbers I didn't realize Fast X made so much of its money overseas. Almost 80%. Domestic alone it's only 9th best. Behind that Transformers piece of shit.

[Dr. Strangelove]

[AlabamAlum]

The Fast franchise has been a farce. The last one I saw was Tokyo Drift. After that, I went full Picard and said, “This far! No further!”

[Dr. Strangelove]

The Fast franchise has been a farce. The last one I saw was Tokyo Drift. After that, I went full Picard and said, “This far! No further!”

I need to watch them. Only ever seen the very first one.

[AlabamAlum]

If you’ve seen the first one, you’ve seen them all. They just get more ridiculous. I saw a trailer for one on Youtube (can’t remember which) where they took a Delorean to space. I’m not even kidding.

[Dr. Strangelove]

Hollywood tradition that by the 4th film you MUST go to space.

But really it's about family.

[iam416]

Little Mermaid had a budget over $250M w/o marketing. Probably add at least another $100M for that. The live action stuff is probably the best they currently have to offer and Disney will surely bleed every last property until it's dead, so they will continue. But, they're biggest problem is they are just out of ideas. They have bled incredibly valuable franchises to death. And, I guess, that approach could have worked w/ good films, but they weren't really interested in that. Folks on the right like to go after Disney for their "Woke remakes" -- and, whatever -- but the truest reality is that most of their films just aren't well-received at the box office because they're almost ChatGPT level scripts.

Ray Skywalker and even Helena were great opportunities to extend those franchises. And with the former, I can say they absolutely fucked that up and with the latter it sure seems like they did. That said, they will, IMO, absolutely extend those franchises with those characters, but those are very not good opportunities.

But, they're running out of live action options. They're going start live-action remakes of live-action remakes pretty soon

[Dr. Strangelove]

Little Mermaid had a budget over $250M w/o marketing. Probably add at least another $100M for that. The live action stuff is probably the best they currently have to offer and Disney will surely bleed every last property until it's dead, so they will continue. But, they're biggest problem is they are just out of ideas. They have bled incredibly valuable franchises to death. And, I guess, that approach could have worked w/ good films, but they weren't really interested in that. Folks on the right like to go after Disney for their "Woke remakes" -- and, whatever -- but the truest reality is that most of their films just aren't well-received at the box office because they're almost ChatGPT level scripts.

Ray Skywalker and even Helena were great opportunities to extend those franchises. And with the former, I can say they absolutely fucked that up and with the latter it sure seems like they did. That said, they will, IMO, absolutely extend those franchises with those characters, but those are very not good opportunities.

But, they're running out of live action options. They're going start live-action remakes of live-action remakes pretty soon

The Marvel movies have become too formulaic, cookie cutter, and too numerous. They had a fantastically successful run but need to rest more now. I know some people here don't really like ANY of them but they were good, generally high quality family entertainment for a decade. The biggest weakness is the continuity and making every movie tied to the others so that they become one big blur.

With Star Wars they should've never brought back anyone from the original movies. Start from scratch. Instead they listened too much to the fanboys who want 'member berries.

And that's the big problem with those two franchises. Fanboys want nostalgia and lore. But you're also trying to create new fans and an excessive amount of "lore" is a barrier to entry. People don't want to do homework by watching 25 movies before you can "appreciate" the next film coming out.

Just a quick anecdote about woke content. I saw a rightwing article earlier complaining that it was WOKE that live-action Ursula (Melissa McCarthy) was modeled after Divine, the notoriously gross drag queen from John Waters movies. Dude! Who do you think the animated version was modeled after? The animators went on the record decades ago about her look resembling Divine.

[THE_WIZARD_]

I'm going to make a movie where I kill DSL....

[iam416]

Re Star Wars and Indiana Jones, I think it's fine to bring back previous characters. And, for that matter, I don't think of "fanboys" pejoratively. I think of them as, well, the hardcore fans who love the films and source material.

Star Wars they could have easily, and I mean EASILY had an Obi-Wan/Luke relationship form between Luke/Ray. And you don't need to be intimately familiary with the source matieral and lore to know that Luke was the dude who sacrificed all to save the goddamn universe from Imperial rule. They could have EASILY made Luke something other than a bitter old man who was, amazingly, not as strong as Ray. They could have easily made Ray flawed and given her an arc where she overcomes her flaws to eventually vanquish an initially stronger villain (like, you know, they did with Luke). They could have EASILY done all of that. Instead, the wrote Luke like total fucking shit and made Ray the ultimate Mary Sue.

I haven't seen Indiana Jones, but I think it would have been incredibly easy to write Helena as a flawed, but strong charater who learns from Indiana and discovers an interest in the same shit he liked and, by the end of the movie, is badass like him. They could have written Indiana as something other than a sorry old man.

So, I can't comment much more than that on Indiana Jones, but on Star Wars, it's absolutely befuddling to me how bringing back Luke could be a problem -- unless you make it a problem with absolutely trash writing. So, yeah, man -- you can blame it the people who love the movies the most, but there was definitely a clear path to make them happy AND introduce a new lead. It's not like they hate women characters -- they love Leia for fucksakes. But they hate baaaaaad (profoundly uninteresting) characters.

So, yeah, Disney fucked it up. And they sure as shit didn't fuck it because they were trying to provide fan service to fanboys -- that is, IMO, exactly what they didn't do. They fucked it up with shitty writing that was, at best negligently awful and at worst maliciously awful.

[THE_WIZARD_]

I can't understand why they don't come out with a Hong Kong Phooey movie...that would kick ass...

[Dr. Strangelove]

Re Star Wars and Indiana Jones, I think it's fine to bring back previous characters. And, for that matter, I don't think of "fanboys" pejoratively. I think of them as, well, the hardcore fans who love the films and source material.

Star Wars they could have easily, and I mean EASILY had an Obi-Wan/Luke relationship form between Luke/Ray. And you don't need to be intimately familiary with the source matieral and lore to know that Luke was the dude who sacrificed all to save the goddamn universe from Imperial rule. They could have EASILY made Luke something other than a bitter old man who was, amazingly, not as strong as Ray. They could have easily made Ray flawed and given her an arc where she overcomes her flaws to eventually vanquish an initially stronger villain (like, you know, they did with Luke). They could have EASILY done all of that. Instead, the wrote Luke like total fucking shit and made Ray the ultimate Mary Sue.

I haven't seen Indiana Jones, but I think it would have been incredibly easy to write Helena as a flawed, but strong charater who learns from Indiana and discovers an interest in the same shit he liked and, by the end of the movie, is badass like him. They could have written Indiana as something other than a sorry old man.

So, I can't comment much more than that on Indiana Jones, but on Star Wars, it's absolutely befuddling to me how bringing back Luke could be a problem -- unless you make it a problem with absolutely trash writing. So, yeah, man -- you can blame it the people who love the movies the most, but there was definitely a clear path to make them happy AND introduce a new lead. It's not like they hate women characters -- they love Leia for fucksakes. But they hate baaaaaad (profoundly uninteresting) characters.

So, yeah, Disney fucked it up. And they sure as shit didn't fuck it because they were trying to provide fan service to fanboys -- that is, IMO, exactly what they didn't do. They fucked it up with shitty writing that was, at best negligently awful and at worst maliciously awful.

Yeah, I mean I just disagree. I can see maybe bringing back Luke, but Han Solo & Leia were unnecessary. Nostalgia cash-ins. Heck, Han Solo's story is basically done when he gets frozen in carbonite. Even way back in '83 he's mostly standing around with nothing to do in Return of the Jedi. I think even Harrison Ford himself has said he had mentally checked out of the character by that point. He's personally, as an actor, way more invested in Indy.

They brought back R2D2. They brought back CP30. They brought back Chewy. I don't think Rey or Po or Finn were doomed to be bad characters but they are constantly shoved aside for old familiar faces. Which is not to say many new characters didn't suck.

Luke at 70 shouldn't act & talk the same as at age 30. I don't like The Last Jedi but at least it TRIED to do something different. Failed in most ways but at least it's trying to do something original.

And then the superfan community was so upset by TLJ that they resurrected the Emperor and pulled Billy Dee out of a retirement home to come entertain the teeming masses. And I've still yet to actually see that thrilling conclusion to the new trilogy so I can't comment TOO insightfully on that one.