Non-Football Related Stuff That Makes you Laugh Your Ass off

[Marko69]

Must share this, hope you see the funny side, but then it'd probably be more funny if you knew my son. He's in Asia touring at the moment. He just sent me a whatsapp message telling me that he and two of his team woke up an entire family. One of the guys staying is an American.

Long story, short...... They were staying overnight in a Thai family's home as guests. They were given mattresses and they were on the floor in a lounge area. The mattresses were paper thin and it was uncomfortable. They were leaving around 6am to catch a boat up the Mekong River. Scott woke up and saw his other pal also awake (the American) ......, Scott whispers, "what time is it?"......, the guy replies, whispering, "it's 05:23"......, Scott whispers, "Perfect. Right, let's get the fuck oot of here!" ....., but the guy started laughing his ass off quite loud. Scott was like, "Sshhhh, what you doin? Stfu!!"
Scotty is now in that guys travel diary as most memorable comment made on the tour.

[Panoptes]

Sorry, don't see the humor.

[Marko69]

Yes, understood. Typed that out soon as I heard about it. Didn't think. Impossible to see the funny side as you can't imagine him saying it, with his funny mannerisms. I'd no doubt be the same if someone else's kid done or said something in their unique way.

[The Cat]

I am not a sexist....never the less.

[The Cat]

https://www.facebook.com/Enterpage/videos/342892589409148/

[Marko69]

^

[dpatnod]

LOL. Trump speaking in Grand Rapids. Just on the TV, he kicked a guy out ('Get him outta here'), after he said 'like a football team, I don't leave anything on the field'.

The expresion is 'leaving it all on the field'. The opposite bizzaro-world quote from a real bizzaro-world POS.

LOL. What an ignoramous.

[Panoptes]

Reported to mod as low information political post

[dpatnod]

LOL. Glad to hear.

Reported for being a..... <can you guess?>

[THE STEE]

laugh at the Viagra commercials.. I mean if you need a pill for the women on the commercials you must be dead.. now if they had Mama June from Honeyboo layin on a bed and she says take a pill and it works...then damn, its a miracle drug

[DanO]

[dpatnod]

laugh at the Viagra commercials.. I mean if you need a pill for the women on the commercials you must be dead.. now if they had Mama June from Honeyboo layin on a bed and she says take a pill and it works...then damn, its a miracle drug

I said the same thing to my buddy this afternoon during the game.

Side effects for those women being my human viagra may include soreness between the legs, difficulty walking and random proclomations to their deity of choice.

[dpatnod]

Did you also notice they never showed the guy's face in the commercial. ONly his back walking towards the woman. Kind of funny. Don't want to be type-cast as 'that guy with junk problems' I guess.

[DeanUK]

Can't really post it all as it a link to some pictures of a magazine. A letter was written to the magazines Spirit Guide to ask for resolvement.

"For months I was relentlessly bullied at work. One day it all got too much and I put laxatives in the ringleaders coffee. That night she had a stroke. She died 3 months later. I was devastated. And since then I keep seeing this woman in my dreams. Did I kill her?"

The reply is a bit longer but equally funny/weird!!

http://www.thepoke.co.uk/2017/01/03/the-laxative-murderer-confesses-all/

[Malto Marko]

This!