Joke Thread

[dsred]

LOL!

[romster]

For DanO:

[MiamiTreo3]

My husband, being unhappy with my mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods.

We've discovered that when I'm in a good mood, it turns green.

When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a big frickin red mark on his forehead.
Maybe next he'll buy me a diamond.
Dumb ass.

[DanO]

Ain't that the truth Rommy.

GO LIONS "09" !!!!!!!!!

[Sharkbait]

A man and a woman who had never met before found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a trans-continental train. They tried to make other arrangements, but the train was full and they were both very tired. They agreed to make the best of it for at least one night. There were two berths, and the man gallantly agreed to take the upper one.

At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you please reach into that closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."

"I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married."

"Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.

"Good," she said. "Get your own fucking blanket."

[-Deborah-]

If you are an owner of a dog that belongs to a 'dangerous breed' category and you also have a small child, please take this as a warning! Don't leave your dog with the child unattended under any circumstances!

Only a short moment was enough for the following to happen:

[MiamiTreo3]

I love it Deb! But I didn't know that a Bull Terrier was considered a dangerous breed.

[-Deborah-]

Yeah, I didn't really, either. Was just a forwarded email I got that made me laugh.

[MiamiTreo3]

Way off topic but some surprises here. Top ten dangerous dog breeds.

http://www.petsdo.com/blog/top-ten-10-most-dangerous-dog-breeds

[SeattleLionsFan]

Hilarious Deb...

[YT]

Funny pic Deb!

Read that article Miami posted. We had a female Dobie growing up and she was a great dog. Loyal, brave and protective of the family.

[DanO]

That's great. LOL.

GO LIONS "09" !!!!!!!!!

[OR Lion]

If you are an owner of a dog that belongs to a 'dangerous breed' category and you also have a small child, please take this as a warning! Don't leave your dog with the child unattended under any circumstances!

Only a short moment was enough for the following to happen:

Looks like Spuds is learning what happens when you drink too much Budweiser.

[DanO]

A guy went to the Post Office to apply for a job. The
interviewer asked him, "Are you allergic to anything?" He
replied "Yes, caffeine." "Have you ever been in the
military service?" "Yes," he said, "I was in Iraq two
years." The interviewer said, "That will give you 5 extra
points toward employment. Then he asked, "Are you disabled
in any way?" The guy said, "Yes....an IED exploded near me
and I lost both of my testicles." The interviewer grimaced
and said, "OK, you've got enough points to hire you right
now. Our normal hours are from 8:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. You
can start tomorrow at 10:00 a.m., and plan on starting at
10:00 a.m. every day."

The guy was puzzled and said, "If the work hours are from
8:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m., why don't you want me to be here
until 10:00 a.m.?"

"This is a government job," the interviewer said, "For the
first two hours, we stand around drinking coffee and
scratching our balls. No point in your coming in for that."

GO LIONS "09" !!!!!!!!!

[Rocky Bleier]

I used to own a Bull Terrier. He was great with people, but you really had to hold on to him when another dog was around. They're great dogs, but you need to be ready for all the energy they have packed into a solid 50-60 pound body.