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Und zey vill haf nein idea frum vich direction ve are comink frum! Ve vill come frum za middle. Ve vill come frum za right. Frum za left! VE VILL FEINT UP ZA MIDDLE UND COME FRUM ZA LEFT AND ZA RIGHT UND ABOVE UND BELOW ALL AT ZA SAME FUCKINK TIME!! (slaps riding crop against leg)
Sounds like guy's poker night at YT's house.........
nice job
The only logical explanation is:
I'm about to die and this is my Jacob's Ladder
Awesome as always Kansas! Laughing like crazy over here.
AAL:to be determined
2011 NFL Draft Wish List:
1. Patrick Peterson Cornerback LSU
2. Mark Herzlich Outside Linebacker Boston College
3. John Moffitt Center Wisconsin
4. Steve Schilling Guard Michigan
5. Jeremy Kerley Wide Receiver TCU
6. Carl Johnson Tackle Florida
7. Johnny Patrick Cornerback Louisville
There's a lot of optimism out there for our Lions. I don't know. Injuries are piling up and, well, they are the Lions. You almost have to be a masochist to be optimistic about the Lions. We've been down this road before, and we all know how that's turned out. It's like being optimistic about picking up Joey Harrington's paper route.
We've got the Bengals tomorrow in the first pre-season game. It sounds like some of our better guys are questionable to play due to injuries. It's kind of hard to tell since Schwartz gives out the injury report like he's a Navajo code talker. For example, apparently Calvin had his ankle taped by a Terminator from the future. Or twisted it. Or something.
Calvin: Whoa! That's too tight. Where's the scissors?
Tuhm-ah-nay-tuh: (Looks around) Ah'll be bawk. (Melts himself in molten steel)
That's why I hate pre-season games; the potential for meaningless, serious injury. I mean, I'm glad football is here and I get to watch all the future bouncers and insurance salesman play. But......sigh. I dunno. Maybe I'm just paranoid. I suppose at some level the game tomorrow will be interesting to watch. The same way watching small children ignore the No Running signs posted around the slippery cement edge of a public swimming pool is interesting. I mean, that's not fun. That's not a pleasant way to spend 3 hours of your life. Holding your breath; waiting for the inevitable. But what if Lashoure is the only sacrifice required by whatever god or gods give a shit about football? What if maybe, just maybe, this year is different? What if everyone else stays healthy all season long? I guess it depends on who you are.
Sure, there's different types of Lions fans. There's the optimists, the pessimists, the prove-it-to-me-firsters. I get that. We're all very different people. We're not Watusi. We're not Spartans. We're Lions fans, with a capital 'L', right? You know what that means? Do ya? That means that we're fuckin' losers. That means we are the laughing stock of every decent team's fans in the entire country world. We are the wretched refuse. We're the underdog. We're mutts! Here's proof: go feel Dano's nose. It's cold! It's also wet, and I don't want to know why. But there's no fan that's more faithful, that's more loyal, more loveable than the mutt.
Who saw the '91 NFC Championship game? Who cried when we got the ever lovin' shit kicked out of us by the 'Skins? (Raises hand) What, nobody cried when we got slaughtered? Well, OK. Neither did I. But there is one thing that we all have in common: we were all stupid enough to follow the Lions. We're mutants. There's something wrong with us. Something very, very wrong with us. Something seriously wrong with us - we're fans. But we're Lions fans! We've been getting our asses kicked for 55 years! We were 0 and 16! Now we don't have to worry about who gets hurt or when. We don't have to worry about whether Stafford's shoulder ends up somewhere below his sternum. All we have to do is believe that once, just once, the gods will smile. The stars will align. And the sun will shine on a mutt's ass.
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